I seldom have bad dreams, and so when I have one, I seem to be able to remember the emotions associated with the dream clearly. Images from the dream are also captured in my mind.
I don’t know if the dream was a coincidence. But yes I was thinking about this friendship recently, and how I have always been the one who put in the effort to contact her every year. She has never been the one to initiate all these years. Last year was the only year I stopped initiating. Maybe some friendships are not meant to last.
So in my dream, I dreamt of this friendship. I was acutely aware in my dreams how this friendship has changed in nature. It is no longer the same. Well, it reflected what I was thinking in reality. But it was still rather disturbing when I woke up, because I have never dreamt of this person before.
And then, maybe just 1-2 days later, Big Leaf told me his ex contacted him, and a lot of old feelings stirred up. He was sick, and it was not a good time to deal with these emotions. I asked if his ex wanted a reconciliation. He said she contacted him because of some mails that were delivered to her place. It was the first time they spoken in many months. He wants to talk to her more and see what happens. There are many unresolved issues left behind. Maybe he could at least get some closure.
I don’t know if I can truly believe that is the case. Maybe what happens could also be they speak again and those “old feelings” were so strong and both decide to give it another try. Back and forth relationships are not uncommon, because both parties are drawn in with the familiarity.
In any case, it was not something I can control or worry right? What is meant to be will be. 🙂
I was upset for a few days, but I was able to recall some of my older learnings and my mood turned for the better right away. I need to continue to lead a fulfilling life.